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The University that I am going to attend

DonnieclarkView Profile
Points:231  User group: Acolyte
Post time: 2017-12-26 05:48 am
Hello,
below is my personal statement to HKU. Please help me to check, are my grammar and the use of words correct ? Any comments or feedback are welcome!
I am an Indonesian. I have always been interested in the business world. I choose Hong Kong to further my study because my family has a business here. Since young, I always love to help my parents manage the workers on our company and help them do their business. I wish to study business and management to degree level as I feel the skills and knowledge I will gain will prepare me for a wide range of careers. Taking a business degree at university will give me an opportunity to develop further my knowledge either it is in business studies, maths and economics which I have enjoyed studying since high school.
When I was in Junior High School, I have been following my parents when they are doing business with customers. I learned a lot of stuff from my parents such as the communication skills and how they are selling the products. Which is good for me because from there, I have known the basic of communications, business and marketing in practical way. And when I was in Senior High School, my parents opened up a cafe. From there, I have learnt how to manage employees from the manager whom my parents hired to manage the cafe, so that they can still concentrate on their business.
I am a perfectionist and am very determined to learn new things. My hobbies are playing futsal and swimming. I also like to watch movies and read inspirational books. In additional, I have a bass vocal which I found it earlier when I joined the choir of my church in Malaysia. And the conductor said to me that my sounds are very good and I should join the choirs if I was to go to Hong Kong.
I am now looking for an opportunity to further my knowledge in business programs and career progression by enrolling with a reputable university on a business management degree course. I am willing to know more about the business techniques and strategies either it is practical or theory. After viewing many different universities I have come to a conclusion that "Hong Kong University" is the best option for me. What's more IBGM course in Hong Kong University is very unique compares to other courses that is offered in other universities. With all these skills that I have gained from my parents, school, personal experiences, family and friends, I am now ready to compete with other participants who are taking this course. I aim to put all the best into the course, and I really hope that you will look favorably upon my application.
Thanks

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